Never in my life have I been in a physical fight- until yesterday. I can’t even begin to explain the adrenaline that was rushing through my body as I held my fist up high threw a punch with my right hand, brought my left in for a solid hook and them bam! Punched again with my right fist for what felt like a lethal blow. I was angry, excited, energized and in a fight or flight state all at the same time. I’d actually never felt anything like this in my life…I was kickboxing and it was crazy fun!

boxing-gloves

If you’ve been following this Power of Play blog series, you know that I’m serious about play. Just because you’re all grown up doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. Each week and more often, every day, I’m making time for play. What I’m finding is that the more playing I do, the easier it comes and the more ideas I have. When I first began this series, I had to look for things to do that were fun and put in real effort. Now it’s become a way of life.

Just yesterday I played tag three times, hula hooped (and learned how to throw it so that it comes right back to me, how cool is that) and played catch- all in one day. In my quest to play I’ve found that it doesn’t take any extra time- what it takes is the desire to want to play and have real fun.  Here’s how simple it is- Yesterday we went to get ice cream and while Noah and I waited for Paris to finish hers I looked at him and said, “Want to play tag?” You should have seen the look in his eyes! He said, “Yes!” and took off running. We were both laughing so hard that I forgot that I was a grown woman hanging out at an ice cream store playing tag (how embarrassing- as I was playing full out)!

When we got home, the kids jumped out of the car and Paris grabbed her hula hoop. “Have one for me?” I said- She excitedly threw me a hoop and although I was horrible (it’s been 20 years!), we laughed a lot. Keep in mind that we didn’t spend an hour hula hopping…it was more like ten minutes, but for that ten minutes, I was a girl…Traci Shafer…the one from the past who loved to play Barbie’s, board games and follow the leader.

Before I began this process to get my girl back, I would have never thought to play. I was the mom who “watched” her kids play. Getting in the game has transformed my life in so many ways. Most importantly I’m having fun, laughing and experiencing joy in the most simple of things. I am feeling less grown up and more childlike…I can’t tell you how good this feels because in truth- it’s been far too long. With a national company and a third book in the midst of the publishing process my life can be pretty crazy. Playing has changed my perspective entirely- things that once freaked me out don’t bother me. I’m less serious, more spontaneous and fully engaged in living in the moment. My entire perspective is different and it’s empowering.

That leads me to my fight yesterday. Because I’m tired of “going to the gym,” I’ve been experimenting with all different kinds of exercises that fall into the category of fun and I’m having a blast! This week I did Pilates on Monday, Kickboxing on Tuesday and today I went for a walk on the beach with my mom. I feel as if I have awakened from a long sleep- the sun is brighter, the water bluer, and the breeze softer on my skin.

I dare you- to join me in the quest for play, adventure and fun! Life is so serious all the time- there is always going to be something to do; someplace to go and something to clean…give yourself a break. Your partner will find you more fun, your kids will be in a state of shock and utter happiness and you- you will feel alive.

Each week, as part of my Power of Play blog series, I will share what I’m doing . . . to fuel ideas for you!  I encourage you to get in the game and read my recent blogs for ideas.  If you’d like to join in on the fun and get my blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s.  You can also share your own stories and ideas here on my blog or on my Facebook Fan page at Get Your Girl Back movement. I can’t wait to hear from you. .

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues


 

It’s not often that you try to nail your 8 year old son in the face with a hard rubber ball. But last week, that’s exactly what I did. When I missed, my son Noah taunted me with a little booty dance. “You little stinker” I yelled, “I’m gonna get you”. I quickly grabbed another ball and while staring directly at Noah, fired it at Paris—my 10 year old daughter—slamming her square in the chest. “You’re going down mom”, she shrieked in mock fury. The next ball flew out of my hands and right into my husbands…crap I’m in trouble! He then begins to fire off balls so hard and fast I thought he might put a hole through our garage door. We were all red-faced, sweaty and slightly hysterical. It was awesome.

 dodge ball

Sounds kind of sketchy, I know, but don’t worry, I wasn’t beating my kids.  I was just playing with them . . . a good old fashioned game of dodge ball. You see, I’m tired of sitting it out. Day after I day I watch my kids play — baseball and gymnastics, swinging and jumping on the trampoline – and I sit and watch.  We cart our kids around from one activity to another, they play while we “busily” attend to our to do list, or scroll through Facebook, or just zone out. But I’m sick of it. Call me selfish but I want to have fun too.  And rather than continue to think about it, last week I decided to do something . . . starting with this incredibly fun game of dodge ball.  And guess what, since our first game, we’ve been out there every day playing.

 

I bet when you were a kid, there were things you loved to do, that brought you incredible joy. In most cases, you didn’t even think about what you were doing, you just did it: hula hooping, tea parties, dancing, putting on your mother’s make up and more. Do you remember that feeling of joy that playing brought you? When I was a girl, I loved to jump into my bedroom closet and play spaceship with my brother Todd. “Captain, ready for takeoff!”  Another favorite?  I pretended to be the drummer for the rock band Kiss! My brother, his friends and I, would put on concerts and I swear…I could hear the screams of the crowd, feel the beat of the drums and the adoration of my fans as I rocked out to “I… wanna rock and roll all night!”

 

I love these memories because playing was fun!  So I have an idea for you.  Join me and bring the power of play back into your life. Just because you’re all grown up doesn’t mean you can’t have fun.  Not so sure? Let me inspire you.  Since our first game of dodge ball, I’ve actively been playing every day.  I have to admit, at first it felt a little odd but within a few days, I felt different; freer, lighter, giddier, and my kids were commenting on how much fun they were having too.  What started as an experiment has morphed into a true reconnection with my girl; the one whose life was ruled by giggles, imagination, and adventure . . . As opposed to anxiety, stress and rigid schedules. 

 

The more I play the more I remember who my girl was, what she enjoyed and more importantly, how she felt.  While I love my life and being a “grown up”, I miss the freedom of my youth (When the words guilt, fear, and worry weren’t even in my vocabulary). As I’m learning to play again, and get my girl back, I’m also weaving that feeling of joy into everything else I do. It’s as if a light switch has been turned on and a breath of fresh air has infused my life.

 

So here is your mission: start playing. Do something you used to do as a kid — jump rope or hula hoop instead of going to that dreaded fitness class.  Or if your kids are playing, get in the game and play with them.  If you’re not sure exactly what to do, start by playing a game of dodge ball!

 

Each week, as part of my Power of Play blog series, I will share what I’m doing . . . to fuel ideas for you!  I encourage you to get in the game and give play a try (starting with Dodge Ball this week).  While it was difficult to figure out what to do at first, it’s now easy- because I’m having so much fun and you will too!

 

If you’d like to join in on the fun and get my blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s.  You can also share your own stories and ideas here on my blog or on my Facebook Fan page at Get Your Girl Back movement. I can’t wait to hear your fun ideas and how it’s impacting your life.

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues


Our Theme Here at Get Your Girl Back today is EMBRACE!

Incorporate 4 New Habits into Your Weekly Housekeeping Routines

As you work to embrace a new way of living, where fun, laughter and adventure rule, we must talk parenthood and home. The fact is someone has to do the dishes, laundry, grocery shop, cook and more- I imagine in most cases, that means you!

I’ve never really met anyone who loves to cook and clean. In fact, a friend of mine has a sign above the laundry room door that says, “Purgatory” – I think that about sums up laundry, ha! That being said, it has to get done so the question is- how can you embrace it and make these tasks less stressful?

woman juggling fruit

Consider incorporating new habits into old routines? Here are a few to consider:

  • Laundry– Buy detergents that smell wonderful and make pulling the clothes out of the dryer intoxicating. Set a basket up for each family member and as you fold, place the clothes in respective baskets and create a new habit where each family member puts their own clothes away.  Kids as young as six can do this and will take great pride once it’s actually done.
  • Food! Nothing is worse than coming home after a long day of work, sports, and non-stop activity than realizing you have to figure out what to cook for dinner.  Consider a new habit where menus are created over the weekend for the upcoming week. Subscribe to a few magazines and pull delicious fresh recipes that are easy, fast and appeal to you (My favorite is Bon Appetit).
    •  Find five to six menus and create your list by using a good app that organizes items by category (and also ensures that list is always with you).
    •  Get what’s needed for the week (if possible) so you’re not scrambling come Monday over what to cook. Being organized is so important to family meal planning, health and your sanity (Cooking Light also has a great app for meal planning).
  • Cleaning: If you work outside the home full time and can give something up in your budget to make space to fund a housekeeper, do it. I promise- this is the best gift you will ever give yourself.  On a daily basis, create a habit where everyone takes their dishes from the table and puts them in the dishwasher, no exception. Consider the phrase, “Will work for food!” Ask for help. Rather than picking up after your kids, start having them pick up after themselves. While it’s easier to do it for them, they must learn to do it themselves and you are not their maid.  
  • Clutter: Spend 10 minutes a day tackling just one area of your home. Even five minutes can do wonders with this new habit. This week focus on the kitchen and dive in for 10 minutes- Cupboards on Monday, mail basket on Tuesday, pantry on Wednesday, fridge on Thursday, dish cabinets on Friday and so on. Within a week your kitchen will feel “lighter” and you will enjoy being in it. The next week move on to another room in your home. By the end of the month your entire home will be decluttered just in time for you to start all over!

These are just a few ideas to tackle the things you probably do most often. While you will never find these task fun, you can take steps to reduce how much time you spend doing them, in turn adding more hours back to your day to do the things you want to do.

Lastly, focus on gratitude.  I imagine the mother of five living in the Democratic Republic of Congo would give anything to have your washer, a grocery store to buy food from (rather than growing and tending to her own), and a home so big and with so many items it actually gets cluttered! See your life through the eyes of women who are less fortunate and you will see these responsibilities not as drudgery, but as the blessings they really are. 

If you have not yet joined us for our FREE Get Your Girl Back Life Series, jump in! Our classes are every Friday from 12-12:30 with Q & A from 12:30-12:45. You can register at www.GYGB.com and join a movement of women seeking a new way of living- free of stress, anxiety and pressure and full of joy, laughter, and abundance! Please share what you are doing to embrace daunting tasks or make them more fun, on our Facebook page at the Get Your Girl Back movement or here in the comments section of our blog. I love to hear from you!

If you’d like to get the daily blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s. 

 

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues


Our topic at Get Your Girl Back today is GROW

Incorporate Play Into Your Day!

pillow fight

You can’t grow by remaining what you are. You have to be open to ideas that will help you create a new way of living. So today’s focus is on fun! Life is so serious and there is always some place to go, something to do, and you will constantly struggle to put yourself on that very important “to do” list. So guess what? I’m going to help make sure you do it!

When you were a girl, I bet you knew how to have fun- from slumber parties to cruising with your friends listening to your favorite tunes, having fun wasn’t something you had to think about doing; it was something you just did! Fun was a way of living.

How much fun have you had these last few years? Could it be time to lighten up, relax your schedule, and incorporate more play into your day? Whether you live alone or are in the throes of raising a family, my challenge to you today is to grow in your ability to have fun.

In our home, fun revolves around the infamous tickle monster (Dave), Friday night dance parties (me), hitting Bush Gardens for some rollercoaster riding fun (the kids and Dave-not me!), jet skiing and tubing, jumping on the trampoline, playing Vet by bathing, blow drying, trimming and brushing our beloved stuffed animals….these are the things that happen in our home on a regular basis and it takes a conscious effort to create fun and keep it alive in our family.

Dave and I also have fun by going on regular date nights- every week it’s either on Wednesday or Sunday, and it’s been that way for ten years. Our fun includes going on long bike rides, hitting the theater, boating, visiting a pub, dancing and more.

I also like to have fun alone- this morning I got up early and went on a bike ride, listened to my favorite music, sang, dreamed, and tended to my soul- it was fun.  l also love and make time to garden, hit my favorite bookstore, read and spend time with girlfriends- all fun.

Since our focus is to grow, in your ability to play more and have fun- I can’t help but wonder. When was the last time you’ve had fun?

This week, think about how you can make each day more fun- Here a few ideas to get you started:

  • When driving, put your cell phone away and blast the music- if you have kids in the car, they will love it!
  • Ride bikes to school with the kids or to work rather than driving.
  • Go on a spontaneous date night (no dinner and a movie- be creative!).
  • Take a bubble bath.
  • When making dinner, light a candle and put on music that inspires you to feel playful.
  • Take your pet to the dog park and play with him.

Small changes to your routine or day can make such a big difference in your life experience in how you feel and in turn respond to those around you.  While life is busy and problems are real, there is no reason you can’t have fun along the way.  Starting today, contemplate your routines and as you go about them, consider how you can add a spark of fun, play or adventure and experience life for what it’s meant to be: Wonderful, delicious, and intoxicatingly fun!

If you have not yet joined us for our FREE Get Your Girl Back Life Series, jump in! Our classes are every Friday from 12-12:30 with Q & A from 12:30-12:45. You can register at www.GYGB.com and join a movement of women seeking a new way of living- free of stress, anxiety and pressure and full of joy, laughter, and abundance! Please share what you are doing to incorporate fun into your day on our Facebook page at the Get Your Girl Back movement or here in the comments section of our blog. I love to hear from you!

If you’d like to get the daily blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s. 

 

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues


Today’s Get Your Girl Back Focus is THINK!

A New Response to the Age Old Question, “How Are You?”

As you work to be more mindful in the way you live your life, and literally enter a new way of living, it’s important to THINK before you act and in some cases, before you speak! The reason thinking is so important right now is that you are retraining your brain!

I want to give you one task or trigger for this week so you can see the big impact a small step can make. When someone asks you how you are, respond positively. Here is what most of us typically hear when asking someone the following question: “Hi! How are you?” Typically responses-

  • Busy!
  • Exhausted!
  • Tired!

FINE

When people hear this, they naturally will reflect the same type of response such as “Oh, me too…” and then the entire conversation turns into who is busier, more exhausted, and has it worst. People don’t do this intentionally but it happens, every single day. I believe that what women are actually saying when responding in this capacity is, “HELP ME!” They are looking for a lifeline, support, encouragement, and hope that things might just get easier.

So- give the world a lifeline. I would like the words, “How are you?” to be the Get Your Girl Back trigger  to force immediate change in your mental state. If you’re serious about getting your girl back, you will make every effort possible to respond with the way you want to feel such as:

  • I’m awesome, thanks for asking!
  • I’m great!
  • Blessed!
  • Wonderful!

Whatever word or words suit your style- pick and use them daily. The results will be astounding- you will begin to feel different, people will respond to you in a way you’re not used to, and that is empowering. You will be like a magnet that others want to be around. Happiness is contagious! 

I realize you may not exactly feel the way you are responding yet- but you have to fake it until you make it and retrain your brain to put focus on what it is you want versus what you don’t want. It’s not going to happen overnight but it is going to happen and fast.

One task, one trigger– can you do it? I know you can! Be the change you wish to see in the world. If you have not yet joined us for our FREE Get Your Girl Back Life Series, jump in! Our classes are every Friday from 12-12:30 with Q & A from 12:30-12:45. You can register at www.GYGB.com and join a movement of women seeking a new way of living- free of stress, anxiety and pressure and full of joy, laughter, and abundance! Please share what happens with this trigger question this week on our Facebook page at the Get Your Girl Back movement or her in the comments section of our blog. I love to hear from you!

If you’d like to get the daily blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s. 

 

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues