By Guest Blogger Gay Norton Edelman, author of The Hungry Ghost: How I Ditched 100 Pounds and Came Fully Alive  bitly.com/1gg7mId

 

Gay Norton Edelman

Gay Norton Edelman

 

Yes, I loss 100 pounds. Yes, I have kept it off for 20 years.

 

People ask all the time how I got the courage to do this.

 

The courage came from desperation. I had been trying all my adult life to get the binge eating and the weight under control. Diets, support groups, therapy, the works.

 

After years and years of trying and failing, grace finally arrived. That day, my doctor prescribed blood pressure pills. I cried all the way home. I had three little kids whom I loved more than life itself. I did not want to leave them to go to rehab. What else was there?

 

My friend Betty had told me about a spiritually based peer support group. I called her and she took me to my first meeting. There I learned that I am a food addict, meaning once I start eating food with sugar, wheat and flour in it, I can’t stop. I was given a food plan and I made a commitment to weigh and measure all my meals with a cup and scale.

 

It was very hard work. That first year, learning how to eat, read labels, exercise felt like a full time job. But I did it. And along the way I learned the most important lesson of all: to pay attention not just to food and exercise but also to my hungry, hungry soul.

 

I had made food a god. I had made food the solution to stress, loneliness, frustration, anger, despair, disappointment and all the other feelings I wanted to avoid. Instead, I needed to depend on a power greater than myself that was based not in things of the world but things of the spirit.

 

All of this was—and is—a lot of work. How do I find the time? How do I not find the time?

 

I have to come first. The things I do to stay in recovery from food addiction, compulsive overeating and obesity are as vital to my health as regular dialysis is to the kidney patient or chemo is to the cancer patient. This is life and death.

 

I work as hard at it now as I ever did. What comes in the way of my health has to be deleted or delegated. My kids didn’t need to be in a bunch of after-school activities and lessons. They needed their mother. My husband didn’t need fancy meals or his laundry done for him. He needed a wife who was alive, well and happy. I didn’t need to be in the stratosphere of my profession. I needed to have me.

 

I don’t mess around, ever. I can’t be perfect. But I never take for granted any of the things I have to do to sustain life.

 

There’s tons of good information about eating right, moving your body, filling your soul needs. And I’ve just published my own self-help book, The Hungry Ghost: How I Ditched 100 Pounds and Came Fully Alive, to explain in detail what I do, and how you can, too.

 

If you decide you really, really want to live, you’ll keep trying and failing, like I did, until you find the way to eat right, move your body, and nourish your spirit.

 

If there is any secret or magic to what I do, it’s this: You only have to do what’s right for your body, mind and soul one day at a time. Too much to think about? Do it just one moment at a time. Trust me, there are still plenty of days when I live by the saying, “Right foot, left foot, breathe.”

 

Simple, yes. Easy? No. But remember, you are one smart woman. You are not alone. And you are so worth it!  

 

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Our topic at Get Your Girl Back today is GROW

Incorporate Play Into Your Day!

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You can’t grow by remaining what you are. You have to be open to ideas that will help you create a new way of living. So today’s focus is on fun! Life is so serious and there is always some place to go, something to do, and you will constantly struggle to put yourself on that very important “to do” list. So guess what? I’m going to help make sure you do it!

When you were a girl, I bet you knew how to have fun- from slumber parties to cruising with your friends listening to your favorite tunes, having fun wasn’t something you had to think about doing; it was something you just did! Fun was a way of living.

How much fun have you had these last few years? Could it be time to lighten up, relax your schedule, and incorporate more play into your day? Whether you live alone or are in the throes of raising a family, my challenge to you today is to grow in your ability to have fun.

In our home, fun revolves around the infamous tickle monster (Dave), Friday night dance parties (me), hitting Bush Gardens for some rollercoaster riding fun (the kids and Dave-not me!), jet skiing and tubing, jumping on the trampoline, playing Vet by bathing, blow drying, trimming and brushing our beloved stuffed animals….these are the things that happen in our home on a regular basis and it takes a conscious effort to create fun and keep it alive in our family.

Dave and I also have fun by going on regular date nights- every week it’s either on Wednesday or Sunday, and it’s been that way for ten years. Our fun includes going on long bike rides, hitting the theater, boating, visiting a pub, dancing and more.

I also like to have fun alone- this morning I got up early and went on a bike ride, listened to my favorite music, sang, dreamed, and tended to my soul- it was fun.  l also love and make time to garden, hit my favorite bookstore, read and spend time with girlfriends- all fun.

Since our focus is to grow, in your ability to play more and have fun- I can’t help but wonder. When was the last time you’ve had fun?

This week, think about how you can make each day more fun- Here a few ideas to get you started:

  • When driving, put your cell phone away and blast the music- if you have kids in the car, they will love it!
  • Ride bikes to school with the kids or to work rather than driving.
  • Go on a spontaneous date night (no dinner and a movie- be creative!).
  • Take a bubble bath.
  • When making dinner, light a candle and put on music that inspires you to feel playful.
  • Take your pet to the dog park and play with him.

Small changes to your routine or day can make such a big difference in your life experience in how you feel and in turn respond to those around you.  While life is busy and problems are real, there is no reason you can’t have fun along the way.  Starting today, contemplate your routines and as you go about them, consider how you can add a spark of fun, play or adventure and experience life for what it’s meant to be: Wonderful, delicious, and intoxicatingly fun!

If you have not yet joined us for our FREE Get Your Girl Back Life Series, jump in! Our classes are every Friday from 12-12:30 with Q & A from 12:30-12:45. You can register at www.GYGB.com and join a movement of women seeking a new way of living- free of stress, anxiety and pressure and full of joy, laughter, and abundance! Please share what you are doing to incorporate fun into your day on our Facebook page at the Get Your Girl Back movement or here in the comments section of our blog. I love to hear from you!

If you’d like to get the daily blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s. 

 

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues


Today’s Get Your Girl Back Focus is THINK!

A New Response to the Age Old Question, “How Are You?”

As you work to be more mindful in the way you live your life, and literally enter a new way of living, it’s important to THINK before you act and in some cases, before you speak! The reason thinking is so important right now is that you are retraining your brain!

I want to give you one task or trigger for this week so you can see the big impact a small step can make. When someone asks you how you are, respond positively. Here is what most of us typically hear when asking someone the following question: “Hi! How are you?” Typically responses-

  • Busy!
  • Exhausted!
  • Tired!

FINE

When people hear this, they naturally will reflect the same type of response such as “Oh, me too…” and then the entire conversation turns into who is busier, more exhausted, and has it worst. People don’t do this intentionally but it happens, every single day. I believe that what women are actually saying when responding in this capacity is, “HELP ME!” They are looking for a lifeline, support, encouragement, and hope that things might just get easier.

So- give the world a lifeline. I would like the words, “How are you?” to be the Get Your Girl Back trigger  to force immediate change in your mental state. If you’re serious about getting your girl back, you will make every effort possible to respond with the way you want to feel such as:

  • I’m awesome, thanks for asking!
  • I’m great!
  • Blessed!
  • Wonderful!

Whatever word or words suit your style- pick and use them daily. The results will be astounding- you will begin to feel different, people will respond to you in a way you’re not used to, and that is empowering. You will be like a magnet that others want to be around. Happiness is contagious! 

I realize you may not exactly feel the way you are responding yet- but you have to fake it until you make it and retrain your brain to put focus on what it is you want versus what you don’t want. It’s not going to happen overnight but it is going to happen and fast.

One task, one trigger– can you do it? I know you can! Be the change you wish to see in the world. If you have not yet joined us for our FREE Get Your Girl Back Life Series, jump in! Our classes are every Friday from 12-12:30 with Q & A from 12:30-12:45. You can register at www.GYGB.com and join a movement of women seeking a new way of living- free of stress, anxiety and pressure and full of joy, laughter, and abundance! Please share what happens with this trigger question this week on our Facebook page at the Get Your Girl Back movement or her in the comments section of our blog. I love to hear from you!

If you’d like to get the daily blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s. 

 

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues




I was born in June and my zodiac sign is Cancer- or the crab. It’s said that when a crab feels overwhelmed she will crawl back into her shell, nest, and isolate herself from the world to find comfort. While I don’t understand our birth signs, I do know this description is spot on for me.

It seems no matter how hard I try to pace myself and live in the moment, it’s a daily battle to keep my girl front and center and in charge. I long for the days when we would drive to work or school listening to the radio, singing at the top of our lungs rather than talking on our cell phones and checking messages at every stop light. I miss having neighbors who liked to chat, pull their lawn chairs up and simply talk. I miss the sounds of children playing games outside in the front yard…now replaced by scheduled sporting events, video games and endless homework.  While I love the convenience of modern life, at times I feel it’s stolen the good life.

One of the greatest challenges you will face on your journey to get your girl back, is slowing down. It almost seems counter intuitive. How do you slow down in a world that is moving faster and faster every day? Just yesterday I was reading through PR opportunities and one of them was on sleep. They were looking for an expert who could talk about life without sleep and why it’s such a waste of time and if it were possible, to engineer ourselves to not need sleep! Can you believe that? I want to cry just thinking about it (yes, you can rant here on the comment section of my blog too). While some do consider it a waste of time, it terrifies me to think what would happen to my spirit and sanity if I didn’t sleep? It’s the only time my brain gets a break.

So how do you slow down? Where do you find the time to work ON your life versus constantly living IN it? Here are three strategies- give one or more a try and I promise you will get a little bit closer to finding your girl and entering a new state of living: New Habits to Start Working on Today!

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  1. Put it Away:  I dare you to just try to put your cell phone away or out of reach for blocked periods of time throughout the day. First of all, charge your phone AWAY from your bed, perhaps in the bathroom when you go to sleep.  Put it on do not disturb and resist all temptation to check messages, text or social updates after a set hour. For me its 8 pm. Give yourself the gift of unplugging. Most of us aren’t doctors and no one is going to die if we don’t immediately respond. If that’s the case for you then set up rules that work for your situation. This one step will immediately improve your sleep, anxiety, and stress levels. It won’t be easy so be prepared. However, once you learn this new habit, of exercising cell phone self-control, you will feel empowered to develop other new habits to fuel happiness in your life. Other no-phone times to consider are dinnertime and morning (keep reading).
  2. Keep it Away: Oh, I know this is so hard but consider how good it would feel to leave your cell phone in its place until after breakfast? Imagine waking up, getting ready listening to music or the news, making breakfast, talking to your family, and starting your day peacefully rather than in an instant panic over what you have to do (flooded in box, numerous texts, etc.).
  3. Stop Multi-tasking: Okay, this goes against everything we do as women but I promise, it will change your life. If you have noticed, men do one thing at a time and do it well. Women? We can literally do up to five things at once. While we may do it well, the fact is we do everything on autopilot and at the end of the day don’t even recall what we did. In short, we are missing our very lives! Just try to do one thing at a time and allow yourself to slow down, breathe, and pace yourself in a moderate manner. I know, crazy right? There is something incredibly freeing about allowing yourself to do one thing at a time.

 

Okay, so I’ve mastered the power of my mind, I know how to change my mental state quickly and can recognize when I’m in a funk. Even with this experience, I still struggle to maintain control over my emotions and thought process- the very things that create stress and anxiety for most of us! For some reason, the brain finds it so much easier to think negatively, worry, fret and ponder everything that can possibly go wrong. Because I’ve trained my brain I enter these states less often than most people. You can say that I’m aware of what’s going on up there and trust me, it helps tremendously. So- as you begin to implement these habits I’ve shared with you, you too will be further training your brain to do what you want it to do versus what it wants to do.

You can slow down, savor the moment and be more present in your life. To make it happen you must decide it’s something you want to do and then step by step begin to take action on those things that steal your joy and in turn your girl. So stop right now and consider the small steps you can take to make big gains in your life. I would love to hear from you as well so please, share what you do to reduce stress and anxiety here on my blog or on our Facebook page at the Get Your Girl Back movement.

If you’d like to get the daily blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s.  If you’re reading this post through the daily email and want to become an Ambassador for Get Your Girl Back, where I’ll ask for help from you from time to time, email me at Traci@GYGB.com and I’ll share what we are up to.  Join our 10 Week Life Class Series starting Friday February 14th from 12-12:30 pm ET! Register at www.GYGB.com.

 

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement