Are You Living in Fear or Possibility?

For the past fifteen years I have called upon an amazing woman, whom I refer to as “My wise sage,” to help me in times of confusion, doubt or struggle. Her actual name is Sue. I’ve never met her in person, have no idea what she looks like but consider her one of the most influential women in my life and her advice and intuition is spot on.

Talking to Sue recently, she said something that rocked me to my core. “Traci, it seems you’re living in fear of the future instead of the possibility in it.” I felt the blood drain from my head and as if I might pass out. Seriously, it hit me like a ton of bricks because she was right and I had no idea.

Most disturbing is that I had always lived my life from a place of possibility- excited about the future- creating it first in my dream journals and then meticulously through very clear goal setting. Not once have I doubted my ability to do something and Sue knew this because she’s been coaching me for 15 years and seen it firsthand. So what changed?

I know it sounds really contrite but the only thing that changed was my thinking. In truth, something has been off in my mind for the past six months and I’ve struggled to access that part of my brain that instills confidence, belief and pure drive. At 44 I was thinking perhaps it was my age and something chemical- or at least that was an easy out for me. But when Sue said, “You’re living in fear of the future,” she unlocked my power- literally. That very day I instantly felt better because I knew what was wrong, my focus and thinking was off. Rather than put energy toward what it is I wanted, I was giving it to what I didn’t want and was afraid might happen in my life.

The brain is a very tricky organ. It needs a job and if you don’t give it one- a clear one, it will take over and in most cases, fill you with doubt, fear and anxiety. For me, this trigger built up due to actions I took in my consulting firm, Bild and Company. I had hired a new CEO the year prior to run my national organization; something I had done myself for over 20 years. While he has done a fantastic job, I never worked through the grieving process of “giving up my position” and also felt powerless to run my business because I had literally handed the job over to someone else. Known to many as the Mindset Mentor, I for sure had lost that ability over the past six months. What I didn’t lose was my refusal to live a mediocre life. Instinctually I knew I was losing the battle of the mind, but simply couldn’t figure out how to regain control. Refusing to give in, it finally hit me- I need to call Sue and thus the beginning of the story.

Almost like a fairy god mother waiving her wand, with one sentence Sue returned my power. Instantly I felt my mind, mood and spirit shift back to living in possibility. I couldn’t do better because I didn’t know better; now I do.

Even more powerful is the process I’ve been engaged in to find one “word” or phrase to encompass what the Get Your Girl Back movement is about. All I can say is God is good because through this experience, tough as it has been, he revealed it to me (and you are going to be among the first to hear it!).

I’ve always lived my life in possibility but many women have not. Before I could help others with this final piece of the puzzle, I had to experience it personally- not what it’s like to live in possibility- but the despair of living my life in fear.

I understand now- Get Your Girl Back for me has always been about possibility- how could I have missed it? The possibility to live an abundant life, the possibility to have a beautiful marriage, the possibility to enjoy great health, the possibility to raise well-mannered children who make a difference in the world, the possibility to use your natural talents and gifts in your work, the possibility to have financial freedom, the possibility to live in gratitude, the possibility to have balance and the possibility to have fulfillment in your life. There are SO MANY POSSIBILITIES! You just have to expect them to show up!

This is the possibility I’ve lived in since I was a girl- that along the way was lost- but regained. This is Get Your Girl Back- so go, live in possibility and make your life what you’ve always dreamed it would be. Comment here on my blog your thoughts, I would love to hear them.

Please, if this message resonates with you, help me spread the word to the women you know and love. Forward them the blog, encourage them to sign up for Notes From Your Girl or advise them to download a FREE dream journal and see what it feels like to map out their life and live in possibility. Just visit www.GYGB.com for any of these immediate actions. Thanks for supporting me through this journey. We are just getting started.

 

 

 

 

Stand Outside Your Windows and Look In- What Do You See?

This morning I was making my latte and listening to Pandora when the song Dave and I danced to at our wedding came on, The Hawaiian Wedding Song. It hit me like a ton of bricks and brought an immediate grin to my face. Turning it up, I stopped and looked around my home, “Who would have thought?”

If you’re married, odds are you remember everything about that moment too. As you swayed to the music you didn’t have a care in the world, this is where you were meant to be, with the people you loved most surrounding you in celebration. For most of us, our wedding song is one of those life moments we never forget (and for some people, one they wish they could forget).

I met Dave 22 years ago. We were kids with big dreams and all of 21 years old! He had shoulder length blond hair and mine was fire red with a rockin spiral perm. To this day Dave begs me to get that hair style back (yeah, right). Who would have thought that together we would travel the world, bury a parent (this wasn’t supposed to happen), start our careers, get married, buy a house (did we really have enough money to do this?), create two beautiful children and live to see the growth of…I’ll say it- grey hair! Can you relate?

Pondering our life together made me feel tremendous gratitude. It’s so easy to take what we have for granted. Whatever your situation, here’s a simple exercise for you to do today. Stop, go outside and look in the windows of your home. Objectively see your life as if a stranger looking in. Your perspective will completely change and instead of seeing what’s wrong, you will see what’s right.

Odds are you have a home, a family and food in the refrigerator. While this sounds pretty basic and a given, it’s not. Women all over the world are repressed in ways most of us can’t possibly imagine. So today, honor them by living in gratitude and truly taking in the blessings of your life. SEE your children, your partner, your furniture, your stove, your washer and dryer, your cabinets with food inside of them, your microwave, your floors, your walls with images of your life…take it all in. It’s beautiful isn’t it? This week, make this your mission- to see what’s beautiful and embrace the way it makes you feel.

Do me a favor, when you go outside and look in the window, come back and share on my blog how you felt and perhaps even what you saw. I would love to hear from you.

Written by Traci Bild, wife, mother, entrepreneur

www.GYGB.com  Get your FREE Get Your Girl Back Dream Journal Download and spend time working ON your life versus simply living IN it.

8 Steps to Organize Your Week

“Either you run the day or the day runs you.” Jim Rohn

Want to feel more empowered, in control and ready to jump into Monday- versus dreading it? Take some time today to or tomorrow to create your life map for the week and most importantly, PRIORITIZE your week and build it around the things that matter most to you.

So many women ask me how I plan my week so I’m giving you the nuts and bolts here. What matters is that you stop and make the time to do this for yourself. The way I teach this will result in your honoring the priorities that matter most in your life, bring fulfillment as well as a great sense of accomplish both at work and at home.

Here is my process:

  1. Set the Mood: Make a delicious latte or cup of tea, turn on your favorite music and go about crafting the week you wish to manifest. No more hoping, wishing and praying- it’s time for action. My routine is a yummy latte in my favorite coffee cup (that my beautiful mom gave me), a candle and the French Café on Pandora – so I can mentally escape to Paris.

 

  1. Get Your Tools: Gather everything you need to prepare for the week ahead. Calendars, colored pens, highlighters, etc. If you’re going to plan your week, you might as well make it fun.

 

  1. Organize the Week: Merge all family calendars into one. I use outlook so typically I’ll add everything in and color code it.

 

  1. Don’t Forget You! Once you organize your work and family calendar, get on the list! Build in when and where you will exercise and care for your health. I literally build yoga, spin, etc. into my calendar five days a week. It’s not always easy and there are days I simply can’t go but- it’s a game changer to allow yourself this time. Your body is the greatest asset you have and sadly, until it’s gone you may not realize this. Even if it’s a 20 minute walk before everyone wakes up for the day, get it on your calendar. Also add in date or time with a friend, even if just for lunch.

 

  1. Plan Your Meals: After the week is set you will have a better feel for what’s needed meal wise- whose going to be home when. Add the meal for each night into your evening calendar and even post the recipe or cookbook page in the notes section. The more you can eat at home, as a family- to meals that are healthy and planned ahead, the happier you will be. Trust me, it’s a mamma thing. We love to nourish those we love (even if you’re not a great cook, because trust me; I am not!). My favorite tools are Bon Appetit and the How to Cook Everything Fast cookbook. Oh and never feel guilty for buying cookbooks or subscribing to cooking magazines. You need the inspiration!

 

  1. Make Your Grocery List: Get a grocery app. Most are free and they will make shopping a breeze. I use My Shop which organizes items by category and allows you to make notes. You can email or text lists as well. Most importantly, you can add to the list all week so if you stop at the store unexpectedly, the list is with you.

 

  1. Pull Everything into a Capture Tool: Okay, this is the best part, what I call the cherry on top! Go into Outlook or whatever calendaring system you use and print out each individual page, Monday-Sunday. Review each day, add notes, highlight important events you do not want to miss and if you want, add an image or inspiring quote at the top of each page. Next print your task list, take all these papers and attach them to a clip board. This is your week’s life map- all captured in one spot, thus titled the Capture Tool. When in car lines, at sporting events or in the car, as papers are given or item to do, just put them on your capture tool clip board- all in one place. No more loose papers, sticky notes or scatter brain.

 

  1. Set Your Intention: The last thing to do is figure out your intention for the week- How do you want to feel, how do you intend to live your life in this coming week or what place will you spiritually, physically or mentally operate from? You get to decide! For example, mine last week was “I want to feel bold and empowered”. Setting your intention, writing it down and owning it gives you incredible power.

Guess what? You are ready to go! Forget being a victim of your week- it’s time to take control of your life.  Getting your girl back is about finding your power and choosing to craft the life you want. When you build the week, month and year around the priorities that matter most, AND HONOR those priorities, you will fulfill that emptiness that nags at you because you are out of balance.

I know this seems like a lot of work but isn’t your life and sanity worth it? I do this every weekend and you will need to set aside an hour because that’s how crazy life is and reining it all in takes some time. I imagine you can do it in 30 minutes if you wish too but my hope is that you will make this a ritual in your week, enjoy this time and allow yourself to embrace all the beautiful chaos of your life.

Want to get in control of your future as well? Download a FREE pdf of our Get Your Girl Back Dream Journal and start dreaming, planning and pondering what is possible for your life- http://gygb.com/download-the-first-chapter/

Please share this blog with the women you love, who are overwhelmed, a bit unorganized and who really want to change their lives. Together we can help them one day at a time.

Written by Traci Bild, Mother, wife, entrepreneur & founder of the  Get Your Girl Back Movement www.GYGB.com.

 

Embracing Imperfection

Sorting through three baskets of laundry that needed tucked away last night, I was down to the towels. As I tucked them into the linen closet I thought to myself, “I hate that my towels don’t match! I bet all of Oprah’s towels match.” What a strange thought right? Yet how many of us have grown up with Oprah, seen her shows, read her interviews and know probably more than we should about her life? One thing I’ve never forgotten is her love of towels and stressing how important it is to have towels that match and that are big, fluffy and filled with comfort.

I’ll admit I’ve tried…over the years I’ve purchased crisp white towels to feel as if I’m in a spa, then brown to match my bathroom décor and no matter how hard I try, there is always the old, worn and what I’ll just call ugly towels- Seafoam green or pink; that are always front and center. You know what I’m talking about right? They are the tried and true, always there, no matter what towels and as hard as you try to dispose of these invaders- they always find their way back into the closet.

Yet last night, as I closed the door to my linen closet I thought to myself, “I think I’m going to keep those towels.”

In truth, they remind me that no matter how hard I try; my linen closet, nor my life will ever be perfect. And- let’s be honest, I’m not Oprah nor should I hold myself to her standards. I’m a business owner with two companies, a wife,  mother of two children and have an incredibly full life- the mismatched towels should be the least of my concerns!

When did we become so concerned about perfection? Isn’t it imperfection that makes us amazing as human beings? So as I opened the door to pull out a towel this morning, I actually smiled and realized that I actually love those towels. So what’s been eating at you? Perhaps its mismatched dishes or an office that is comprised of hand me down furniture given to you as you worked to build your company. I imagine something is coming to mind right now! How might you look at it differently today? Rather than beat yourself up, consider smiling and finding what’s good about it and moving on because if it’s not fixed by now- odds are it will be that way next year and the year after too.

My vow is to stop seeking perfection and instead embrace the gorgeous chaos that is my life, imperfections and all. What about you?

Share here on our blog! What imperfection is eating at you? How might you see it differently going forward?

Written by Traci Bild, Mindset Mentor

www.GYGB.com

 

The Truth Hurts- Excuses I Made, Opportunities I Missed

(posted today on my Working Mother magazine’s “Walking Zombie” blog)

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Last year while on vacation I repeatedly told myself a big fat lie- At an amazing adventure camp for both kids and parents, I had the opportunity to learn the flying trapeze, to water ski, tube, and more. While I did indulge some, on many occasions I simply opted out. To be honest, I don’t even know why…it was just easier to say, “No thank you, I’m good,” and encourage my kids to participate.

But the truth is, each time Dave or the kids did something really cool like swing from the trapeze, I thought to myself how amazing it would be to give it a try. Yet time after time I just sat and watched.  Looking back, I now realize that much of my resistance was a combination of fear of the unknown, the inability to get outside my comfort zone and pure laziness. It just took too much effort. Each time, after I passed, I would get this terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to dive in and have crazy fun, I did! It was just easier to watch everyone else have it.

We want back to Callaway Gardens again this year. I’m quite certain this is now going to be an annual family tradition. I made a mental decision that this time; I was not going to sit it out. I was going to step out of my comfort zone, face my fears and do all the things I refused to do last year. I also had this gut feeling that my daughter Paris, who is ten, was watching every decision I made. As her mother and mentor, if I wasn’t going to do it for myself, I was going to do it for her.

In the course of one week, I raced Dave on a crazy water obstacle course called aqua island and laughed so hard I almost passed out, water skied, tubed, climbed an 80 foot tree that scared the life out of me and zip lined over a beautiful lake, biked for hours on end, studied garden ideas at an edible garden, learned how to do a backflip on a flying trapeze, caught lightening bugs, and sat alone in an old chapel along a wooded path and pondered my life.

Who do you think had more fun? The stuffy woman who chose to sit it out or the adventurous girl who chose to dive in? The only difference between last year and this year was my mindset. Last year I had no intention, I was just there, on vacation with my family. This year I set out with the intention to have a blast and to do everything that scared and got me out of my comfort zone. This by far was one of the best vacations of my life. While I’ve been to France, Spain, Germany, the BVI and more…this little place in the Georgia mountains stole my heart because it called to the girl in me and beckoned me to play. I am so glad I said yes! I still can’t believe the impact it had on my life.

When is the last time you did something daring, adventurous, and crazy fun? What inhibitions are holding you back from letting the girl inside you come out to play? Whether at work, home or while on vacation, I challenge you to set your intention in regards to how you want to be, what you wish to feel and the experiences you desire to have and then set about creating them. Like me, you may just find it changes your life.

Written by Traci Bild, work-life balance expert and Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement. Follow us on Facebook (Get Your Girl Back movement) for more inspiration and ideas to live a life of adventure, fun and sheer bliss! To download the first chapter of Traci’s forthcoming book, Get Your Girl Back, visit  http://gygb.com/the-book/.

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A Millionaire’s Confession: I Don’t Feel Worthy

I recently blogged on Savor Magazine’s site about a moment recently where I didn’t feel “worthy” enough.  Yes, it still happens.  Well all I can say is WOW! Your responses were so moving.  I’m sharing the article again here in case you didn’t read it.  One thing is very clear: the power we have to lift each other up is amazing and I’m thankful for my working mother sisterhood.

Here’s what I wrote:

In a Savor mastermind meeting today with a group of women I regularly meet with in New York City, I felt the blood drain from my head, my fingertips go numb and my eyes fill with tears. My mentor, Angela Jia Kim, had challenged me to a moment of truth and I was not ready for it.

We were discussing my brand when she said, “Your brand is about giving people hope. Throughout your life you’ve had different individuals tell you that you weren’t good enough, and as a result, you’ve worked your ass off to prove them wrong. Traci, you are still trying to prove your worth.”

Having known me for two years, it was no use to try to pretend she was wrong. Sitting in front of nine business peers, I almost collapsed on the floor in tears.

The fact is, I’m 44 years old and still holding on to the words of my ninth grade English teacher who said, “You’re just not a good writer”; the college classmate who out of nowhere said, “I don’t know why you are here. One day I’m going to be your boss”; the fellow cheerleader in high school who came over for pre-game pizza at our apartment and said, “Yuck, you have roaches in your cabinet.”

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Today, my armor of accolades offered no protection. The successful business, published books, and spoils of success were shattered by the raw truth:  I don’t feel worthy. I was busted.

Despite my discomfort, I needed this moment of vulnerability. The grown woman, Traci Bild, has spent the last 25 years trying to rescue the young girl, Traci Shafer, who was trying to prove her worth to the world.

I took a deep breath, wiped the tears from my eyes, and for the first time in my life acknowledged this truth. While difficult, it was incredibly liberating. I’ve been in prison for years and today, thanks to my mentor, I was given the keys to freedom.

It is now up to me to decide whether to stay a prisoner of these limiting thoughts, or to set myself free, and I choose freedom! Going forward, I will speak, write and work not to prove I’m good enough, but for the purpose I believe so powerfully in – to help women find THEIR all versus IT all.

Words are powerful and can impact our lives in tremendous ways. Perhaps it’s time to consider your own truth – what beliefs are you holding onto that are limiting your ability to step into your destiny? While not easy to ponder, the truth will set you free.

Homework Assignment:

Answer these questions in your journal:

1. What labels have you picked up that need to be shed?

2. Journal about this today and see where it leads you.

– See more at: http://blog.savorthesuccess.com/dream/worthy/#sthash.IEc6OWw5.dpuf

Fear Stole My Confidence Today & I Lost Out

(from my Walking Zombie blog on WorkingMother.com)

Yesterday my family went zip lining at Calloway Gardens in the Georgia Mountains. We strapped on our gear, headed into the trees and zealously moved from one obstacle to the other. Two hours in we were still going strong until I realized we were close to the end of the main zip line course and about to enter the Lake course. Out of nowhere I started to sweat really bad- my hands were slipping from the lines, my t-shirt sticking to my chest and my heart beating faster and faster. Having done this very same course last year, I knew what was coming…the tree. As hard as I tried I couldn’t shake this horrible fear.

The lake course has three exhilarating zip lines. That- I wanted to do! But to get to the second one you must climb an eighty foot tree via a wooden rope ladder. Last year it took everything in my being to get up that ladder. This year, I knew what was coming. I had done it before but this was the first time our whole family was zip lining this course together and Noah’s first time at all! Dave was leading from the front and I was following up from the back. This had worked all day until we got closer and closer to the tree.

Ending the main course we walked over to the Lake. Shaking, I climbed up the first ladder, telling myself, “I can do this, I can do this!” but the reality is I had already talked myself out of it- I was terrified. How was I going to watch my two children climb an eighty foot ladder, step onto a platform high into the tree tops (and the size of my kitchen mat), and not pass out? Standing at the top of a smaller platform, I stared at the tree…taking it in, I told myself, “You’ve done this before, it’s no big deal, just climb the ladder, step onto the platform and zip over the lake!”

Then I looked down to see an employee and suddenly, I had my out! “Can I pay you to please follow my kids? I won’t let them go without someone behind them and honestly I don’t want to do it!” He offered to go, no charge and I was out- free from the torture of climbing the ladder up the tree. Someone would head up the front and back, ensuring my kids were safe but it wouldn’t be me. I was so relieved I wanted to cry. He went up and I went down…my family continued on.

I sat on a bench and watched from afar. As I saw my eight and ten year old children climb the tree I realized I had failed them. I let fear, false evidence appearing real, steal my confidence and in turn my joy. My fear would keep me from the feeling of accomplishment and adrenaline my family would feel- instead, I would be defeated. The truth is, I had done this before, had fun, and challenged myself in a huge way. The only thing different this year is I let fear get the best of me.

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How many times have you let fear get the best of you? Perhaps you had the opportunity to take a promotion and out of fear, declined and missed the opportunity of a lifetime. Maybe you were offered a job oversees but declined due to your fear of the unknown or you wanted to launch a new business but changed your mind for fear of failure. Fear is very real and as I learned yesterday, it can steal your girl in a nanosecond. That girl who stops at nothing to get what she wants, who is bold, confident and full of hope. Looking back on my experience I realize that yesterday, fear won. The next time we battle, I will win. What about you?

Swing, Swing, Swing on a Summer Day….

Sitting on the swing, feeling the wind blow through my hair as I flew into the sky and felt the tossing and turning of butterflies in my tummy was pure bliss- for the first time in years, I was actually swinging. Beside me my eight year old son Noah was laughing and saying “Mommy look! We are swinging at the exact same height!” Perfectly in synch, although for just a moment, we sailed through the air and for a moment…I felt like a young girl again.  Giggling I kicked my legs in an effort to go higher and higher…I couldn’t believe how good it felt to let go and immerse myself in the pure joy of childlike fun.

Young Woman Swinging

How many times have I gone to the park with Paris and Noah, only to sit and watch them play? For years I have gone only to sit and watch or dabble on my cell phone checking in on email, social media and texts. Isn’t that what moms do? We drive, sit, watch and wait…while our children live their lives, play with friends and have incredible life experiences. Yet over the last year something changed. I started to ask myself, “Why do they get to have all the fun?” I found myself jealous as I watched my daughter challenge herself to do a back tuck at gymnastics or Noah center up and position his feet in the perfect position to hit the ball and quickly run to first base. I would think to myself, “Why am I just sitting here?”

The young girl inside of me was literally starting to surface in everything I did. “Can I come out and play?” I felt her voice, her presence and her desire to bring fun, adventure and joy back into my life. So I said yes- literally! I made a conscious decision that I was no longer going to sit around and watch. I was going to get in the game and play. Like my children, I too wanted to have fun. I love being a mom, running a business and being a wife but what I miss is the freedom of plain old fashioned fun!

Since that time I’ve made it a point to play a little bit every day. I no longer care what people around me think because in my heart I know- they want to play too; so I’m taking the lead and doing what I’ve longed to do all these years. When I take Noah to baseball I get out on the field with him before the game and play catch, I run the bases and hit the ball. Before bed I grab a deck of cards, look at my kids with a competitive eye and say, “Who wants to play?” and when stepping on stage to speak to an audience at a conference, all grown up and in my fancy suit I think to myself, “Remember when this was your dream?” No more zoning out as I speak for the 10,000th  time- I’m there, full of passion and joy as I savor in the fact that I once dreamed of this job…and today it’s my freakin’ reality!

I don’t know how to explain the transformation I’ve experienced other than saying, “I feel alive!” I’ve always been a passionate person, full of life but the truth is, like other women- I’ve been a walking zombie! Alive, fully functioning but sort of dead inside- Tired, stressed, anxious and part of a vicious cycle called “Being a grown up”- I was going through the motions.  While I love my kids and wouldn’t trade a moment of my mom experience for the world, I would trade in my laundry and housework for a housekeeper (which I have!), meal planning and cooking for a chef (on my list), and carpooling to school and sporting events for a chauffeured limo driver! While that sounds nice the fact is it’s not realistic- so what I’ve done instead is found a way to make ordinary days extraordinary by putting the power of play into everything I do. The result is I’m laughing more, relaxed, less serious and more in tune to life and the many joys in it.

If you’re reading this blog then odds are you are a mother and wife who also manages a full time, chaotic work schedule. You do everything for everyone but you. I would like to be your voice of reason and my goal is to inspire you to step back, relax, take the pressure off and start to add play into your day. At first it will seem a little odd- if not crazy; but I promise, you will feel more alive than ever before! So the next time your kids are playing, get in the game! Sing at the top of your lungs when hearing your favorite song, skip to get the mall, put the windows down, let the wind blow through your hair and find pictures in the clouds. Life is rich and full of wonder- sadly the woman, bogged down by life is missing it all. Open your eyes, take a deep breath and make the decision to get your girl back once and for all.

 If you’d like to join in on the fun and get my blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s.  You can also share your own stories and ideas here on my blog or on my Facebook Fan page at Get Your Girl Back movement. I can’t wait to hear from you.

Written by Traci Bild, Author and Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement

Yesterday I Got Into My First Fist Fight…

Never in my life have I been in a physical fight- until yesterday. I can’t even begin to explain the adrenaline that was rushing through my body as I held my fist up high threw a punch with my right hand, brought my left in for a solid hook and them bam! Punched again with my right fist for what felt like a lethal blow. I was angry, excited, energized and in a fight or flight state all at the same time. I’d actually never felt anything like this in my life…I was kickboxing and it was crazy fun!

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If you’ve been following this Power of Play blog series, you know that I’m serious about play. Just because you’re all grown up doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. Each week and more often, every day, I’m making time for play. What I’m finding is that the more playing I do, the easier it comes and the more ideas I have. When I first began this series, I had to look for things to do that were fun and put in real effort. Now it’s become a way of life.

Just yesterday I played tag three times, hula hooped (and learned how to throw it so that it comes right back to me, how cool is that) and played catch- all in one day. In my quest to play I’ve found that it doesn’t take any extra time- what it takes is the desire to want to play and have real fun.  Here’s how simple it is- Yesterday we went to get ice cream and while Noah and I waited for Paris to finish hers I looked at him and said, “Want to play tag?” You should have seen the look in his eyes! He said, “Yes!” and took off running. We were both laughing so hard that I forgot that I was a grown woman hanging out at an ice cream store playing tag (how embarrassing- as I was playing full out)!

When we got home, the kids jumped out of the car and Paris grabbed her hula hoop. “Have one for me?” I said- She excitedly threw me a hoop and although I was horrible (it’s been 20 years!), we laughed a lot. Keep in mind that we didn’t spend an hour hula hopping…it was more like ten minutes, but for that ten minutes, I was a girl…Traci Shafer…the one from the past who loved to play Barbie’s, board games and follow the leader.

Before I began this process to get my girl back, I would have never thought to play. I was the mom who “watched” her kids play. Getting in the game has transformed my life in so many ways. Most importantly I’m having fun, laughing and experiencing joy in the most simple of things. I am feeling less grown up and more childlike…I can’t tell you how good this feels because in truth- it’s been far too long. With a national company and a third book in the midst of the publishing process my life can be pretty crazy. Playing has changed my perspective entirely- things that once freaked me out don’t bother me. I’m less serious, more spontaneous and fully engaged in living in the moment. My entire perspective is different and it’s empowering.

That leads me to my fight yesterday. Because I’m tired of “going to the gym,” I’ve been experimenting with all different kinds of exercises that fall into the category of fun and I’m having a blast! This week I did Pilates on Monday, Kickboxing on Tuesday and today I went for a walk on the beach with my mom. I feel as if I have awakened from a long sleep- the sun is brighter, the water bluer, and the breeze softer on my skin.

I dare you- to join me in the quest for play, adventure and fun! Life is so serious all the time- there is always going to be something to do; someplace to go and something to clean…give yourself a break. Your partner will find you more fun, your kids will be in a state of shock and utter happiness and you- you will feel alive.

Each week, as part of my Power of Play blog series, I will share what I’m doing . . . to fuel ideas for you!  I encourage you to get in the game and read my recent blogs for ideas.  If you’d like to join in on the fun and get my blog post by email, sign up at http://bit.ly/1j2ol3s.  You can also share your own stories and ideas here on my blog or on my Facebook Fan page at Get Your Girl Back movement. I can’t wait to hear from you. .

Written by Traci Bild, Founder of the Get Your Girl Back movement & expert on Women’s Issues